A Girl, A Park, and the Dark

There was something moving in the dark.

“Testy?” Rachel hissed. She froze in the act of grinding out the last cigarette in her pack.

No answer.

“Testy!”

“Right here, doll,” came the voice, but it was farther away than Rachel had expected.

“Oh, hell,” she muttered, and crashed on through the underbrush, trying to find her erstwhile fairy godmother.

The park had turned out to be not just dark, but frozen. Where there might have been paths in summer, the last week of December held dark ice slicks. What might have been pretty groundcover in spring, the winter had reduced the stiff, black sticks eager to tear at her boots and jeans.

“Oh, hell, Testy, where are you?”

“Waiting for you, sweetie pie, just waiting.”

She sounded as if she were reclining by a poolside.

“Testy… shit!”

“Careful, showgirl,” the drag queen cautioned.

“Thanks a lot. Will you help me? And will you tell me what’s going on?”

Rachel suddenly felt a strong grip on her forearm. “Walk this way, baby, and Auntie Testy will tell you. But you gotta stay close, because these woods are dark. I wouldn’t want you to get lost like some kind of fairy tale princess needing to be rescued. And the story’s long. And you’re not going to like it.”

“You mean I’m going to like it less than getting hauled out here in the middle of nowhere in the freezing cold in the fucking wilderness, where probably murderers and rapists are just waiting to jump on us? Because I’m loving this, Test. I’m really loving it.”

“Oh don’t worry, babydoll. New York rapists are way too smart to be out here in this cold. They’re all home in front of their fires.”

“And why aren’t we?”

“Ah. Well, that’s the thing, doll. See, my friend, the one we came here to look for way back when it was warm? I think he might be coming. He might be here tonight.”

“Here? Out here in the dark? What kind of guy is this, Testy? What. The. Hell. Is. Going. On?”

“Hm. Yeah, I can see how that might sound odd. Okay, here goes. Can you see the path now?”

“Sort of. Don’t get too far away. Where are we going?”

“Up. Now what you need to know is, I met someone just a week or so before we left Vegas. Before I pried you off the Extrav! Stage and saved your gorgeous ass from that snake pit.”

“Testy…”

“Sorry, sorry. Okay, you know how I used to go out driving, sometimes? Hoot and holler and get away from all the pressures of you girls throwing sewing at me?”

“Yeah. I remember that.”

“Okay. Well, I met this babe out there this one night…”

NEXT POST: TESTY'S STORY (Friday 2/5)